20 Something in LA LA land...

The night of mexican, margies, and ex's.

I'll start this story with a little bit of history.  In 1997, I went to Israel with a group of 150 kids and counselors for 8 weeks to study Hebrew and Judaism and Israel.  It was probably one of the more amazing experiences I have had in my life.  You are forced in such a short time to make tons of new friends and really understand who you are.  At age 16 - which is a very hard thing to do.

I've talked about this before here.  So you can catch up on what happened with the two guys there in Israel.  Since then we have remained close and very much in touch, but last Friday, for the first time, both of the guys, their girlfriends, C and I all got together.

There is something very strange that happens when you realize that you are sitting at a table with your current boyfriend of 4.5 years, one guy who used to REALLY like you and used to make out with quite often, and another guy who you used to like at one point as well and even slept with once upon a time, a long, long time ago.  Oh yeah, also both of their awesome, adorable current girlfriends.

Let me tell you - it's fucking weird.

One specific highlight?  When I was chatting with one of their girlfriends and found out SO MANY similarities between her upbringing and family life and mine - her dad does the EXACT same thing at the same hospital as mine - and I literally said, "well, he sure knows how to pick 'em" OUT LOUD (referring to my friend - her boyfriend).  Awwwwkkwwaaarrd.  There may or may not have been MANY margaritas consumed at that point.

Another highlight?  When the mariachi band came by and asked for any requests and one of the guys loudly requested "Wish you were here" by Pink Floyd which was SO our song.  I kept on giving him the "what the hell are you doing - your girlfriend is right next to you!" eyes.

I guess the craziest part is that the things that I always liked in both of those guys - I see in C.  And I see a ton of similarities between myself and their girlfriends.  On top of all of that?  We all got along amazingly and if we all lived in the same city?  I would have no doubt it would happen more often.

Still sick.

I cannot believe that it's Monday morning and I am STILL feeling under the weather.  This cold, by far, is one of the strangest colds I have ever had...

Tuesday night I started to feel a bit of a lower throat/chest/cough thing.  That lasted through Friday morning, when I started to get worst in the chest region, and my head felt a little "floaty".  Saturday I hardly had a voice and my throat KILLED, and starting yesterday my nose was a runny faucet.  Well, either that or a stuffy mess. And this morning, I'm not that much better.  I cannot stop sneezing!!!

Last night, I sent a text to my partner telling her I may not show up to work today, depending on how I feel.  Of course, she was completely fine with that.  However, I woke up this morning feeling ill but still wanting to go to work!  It's an important day for us and I don't want to miss any of it.  Especially considering the fact that the writers are officially on strike and I may not have a job to go to before I know it. 

So I just took a couple of Dayquil and hopefully, within the next few minutes, I'll feel good as new.  It kinda reminds me of this time in college where my best friend and some guys that we were into were going to Vegas one weekend.  The day that we were supposed to leave, she and I both came down with bad colds with fevers.  Instead of canceling the trip, we loaded up on Dayquil for the WHOLE weekend and went about our business as usual.  We were in Vegas so of course that meant drinking A LOT.  How stupid were we???  You should see the pictures. 

That has been my life for the last few days.  I really hope that this cold goes away (the strike as well) and I start to feel back to normal.  Enough is enough!  And I hate to brag about C again but oh my god, if you guys could only see what a good caretaker he is of me - it's amazing.  Anything I want he gets for me, he cooks for me, always gets me kleenex, gives me massages, and gives me puppydog eyes because he really feels bad for me being sick.  Not once have I felt like I have imposed or have grossed him out because honestly?  The amount of used kleenex and the sounds that have come out of my nose and mouth?  NOT PRETTY.  Bless his heart :)

Our sweet little Molly

Wow.  It's interesting the way your day can change from 8 am to 8 pm.

Yesterday morning, I had received the news that I got the job that I have been wanting pretty much all summer.  I finally felt relief and excitement, and even pride that at my age I had made it this far.

That's when I got the call from my mom saying she felt that after 15 and a half years, it was time for our sweet Molly to leave us.

Molly was our Belgian Shepard.  We had gotten her 15 years ago, when she was only 11 weeks old.  I remember driving to the Culver City area with the whole family on the way to the breeders.  My sister and I were told we could name her.  Since we were obsessed with Days of Our Lives at the time and our favorite character was Molly, the name seemed fitting.

She was black sweet cuddly love of a dog.  She always had a ton of energy, sometimes too much where she would nip other dogs and even some human butts.  We tried training but to no avail.  Molly was just Molly, with her quirks and her spastic energy.  No matter what, she always was loving.

We had three dogs at the time.  Mikey, Molly, and Mandy.  Mikey was adorable as well, a loving Golden Retriever.  Mandy was a rescue dog, a French hound, who was not so nice and sweet, and poor Molly got the brunt of it.  Over time, we had to let bot Mikey and Mandy go to doggy heaven - Mikey got incredibly sick and Mandy also got very arthritic and was in pain.  That meant Molly got all the love!  And what kind of love - more than any dog I know.

My mom loved Molly many times more than she loved anyone else.  She would be fed only the best human meals, with different meats that my mom would cook for her before she would cook dinner for her husband.  It was so cute, my mom and Molly, how they would be attached to eachother, literally never going into one room without the other one following behind. Although I have to say Molly was usually following.

The last couple of years have been hard for Molly.  She always had bad hips and bones, but in her years of age she started to really show difficulty.  On top of that, my mom moved twice due to remodeling and a fire in the last year and a half which no doubt was stressful for Molly.  But she had still been managing, although it was difficult.

These last couple of days have been really difficult for my mom and Molly.  She couldn't go on long walks, because in the middle of them she would just fall to the ground - without any energy to keep walking, her poor muscles couldn't handle it.  She would drag her back legs and walk with such a limp.  My mom would put down her food and she would have a hard time even getting to the food, and when she was eating she would have to do it almost laying down.

My mom has always been a wonderful mother - that's why she knew that yesterday should be Molly's last day.  I went to her house and was there with some other family and friends - my mom called it her support circle. For a few hours we talked about Molly, pet her, hugged her, loved her.  My mom fed her a filet mignon - her first - as a "last meal".  The veterinarian came to the house - thank God for that - talked to us for a bit, and my mom finally made the decision that she was ready. 

Molly was calm, as it was done in our living room with her family there to hug and love her.  She was put to a deep sleep when we left the room for the procedure to actually be done. 

Yesterday was probably one of the hardest days in my life.  I loved Molly so much, and really bonded with her in the last two years.  But more than that, I know how much my mom loved her, and to see my strong mother break down the way she did yesterday, over and over, about how she was losing her best friend, was one of the more difficult things for me.  I had to take my sadness for Molly out and be strong for my mom.  She felt so helpless and sad, and looked at me in my eyes over and over needing some justification for the way she felt.  But we knew that this was the right thing, so that our sweet Molly could die with dignity.

The sadness really hit me last night - C and I went to dinner and it was all I could think about.  When I got home I went into my room and broke down.  I needed to really cry - I had been holding most of it in all day. I couldn't sleep last night, her image just kept popping up in my mind.

But I feel better today, and so does my mom.  We know that Molly is in a better place with no pain, and filet mignon for every meal. And she knows that we loved her so much, and only made the decision out of love.

R.I.P. Molly. I love you.

Reunion

In the summer of 1997,  I had a life-changing experience.  Like I've mentioned, I'm Jewish, and there are summer trips for high school students to live and study in Israel for 8 weeks.  I was never a camp girl.  I would always want to as a kid, but then my sister and I would get there and beg our mom to pick us up because Super Mario Bros. and the friends that we already had sounded SO much better.

But when I was 16 and my best friend JW said she was going and how fun it would be to go together, I was immediately in.  I remember it so well.  The long flight.  The strange orientation where everyone was supposed to just become friends.  The pairing of roommates and dividing into groups.  Within the first few days of the trip, JW and I had made our group.  A couple of other girls and a few different guys.  We had so many laughs on that trip.  And we also were able to see and feel Israel - an amazingly spiritual, beautiful country with more history than anyone can imagine.

But the best part were the connections JW and I made with two guys, A & D.  When you spend every hour with the same people in a different country, you immediately bond and feel you know each other better than you would in your normal environment.  About a week after we got there, JW started to date a guy.  And then a few days later, A & D sat me down on a grassy lawn (I'll never forget it) and told me "we both like you, DG. So you've gotta choose who you like."  We were SUCH teenagers.

I had never had that happen to me before.  Sure, guys had told me they liked me, but two?  Friends? At the same time?  Needless to say, I was flattered.  But I really didn't like either of them like that.  However, that didn't stop me from making out with both of them on the trip.  (Shut up, I said JUST making out).  One day it was A.  Then I would look at D and decide him.  And back and forth.  And then one night we had some sort of talent show where A sang (I know, I know - SO freakin' cheesy) and D played the guitar (now that was hot) a song dedicated to me (yup, they told all 120 of us).  It was "Wish you Were Here" by Pink Floyd.  Why? Who knows.  But it was touching and adorable. 

But the truth was, I didn't really like either of them.  Sure, I was flattered by it, but I didn't have true feelings, so after a while of that, we just ended up as friends.

When we all got back to LA, we stayed friendly but moved on in the relationship department.  JW and I were back at school and all was well until she and I found some drama to break our four year bond.  College came and everyone went to different cities around the country.  We would see each other at the occasional party during Christmas break when everyone was home which would be great.  Finally, JW and I made up and all was well, although we would never be as close as we were in 1997.

A now lives in west LA and works at a studio there in development.  JW lives in Beverly Hills and we talk randomly through myspace.  D lives in Manhattan, and has been there now for four years.  But he emailed the three of us a few weeks ago saying he was coming to LA and it was time for a 10 year reunion.

So there we were last night.  The four of us at an expensive, trendy Sushi restaurant in Beverly Hills. I couldn't believe it had been ten years already.  JW  apparently had a bit of a "rock bottom" moment 6 months ago, where she found herself drinking so much almost every night where she was blacking out and then also doing cocaine so much that she didn't even feel that it was working.  So, for 6 months, she has been completely sober and so strong.  I couldn't be more proud of her.  A finally got his Jewish girlfriend (he had been looking for a long time) and he is on the road to executive at a major studio.  And D?  He is just about to move in with his girlfriend of two years in Manhattan.  Also working for a major network and doing really well.

So there we were, 10 years after the fact, now all well into our 20's.  Moving up in the world.  And getting along like we had never left each other's sides. 

We could have sat there until 6 am, but alas, people have work today.  But these friends?  They will be there always.  That is something I am eternally grateful for.